TAKEAWAY DOODLES

People are requesting doodles on their takeaway boxes, with surprising results. I'd be scared that the surly recipient of my order would decide to smear his or her own bodily excretions on my food rather than getting arty.

Dutch model Doutzen Kroes does her service for lingerie enthusiasts and degenerate fappers the world over by appear in nothing but lacy Victoria's Secret undercrackers. God bless you, and all who sail in you.

Now this is NOT what we have come to expect from those delicate creatures of the human species. This just goes to prove that women can be just as godawful as men when it comes to acting like delightful douchebags.

Beaches are a great place to relax and unwind. Unless the beach in question is this beach. This beach has planes flying so low over it that the turbulence can cause serious physical harm. Not exactly relaxing, eh?

Who doesn't love Oktoberfest? A festive time filled with ample assets, beer and lederhosen!

The amazing American actress proves that she can make anything look stunning just by being in the same vicinity - WOW!

We've never heard of a tight dress suffocating a young woman and we do hope the women in this gallery are all alright and able to breathe properly and live life to the full after these various shots were taken. MY GOD THESE DRESSES ARE TIGHT!

It's what you get when you combine college girls full of hormones, no parents and LOTS of alchohol. This is one very good reason why you should study hard to get a university education gentlemen - Let's PARTY!!!

What's the one thing that you really look for in a female, think about it, yep, getting warm, it's a smile that can light up a dark room and make you feel special. You know i'm right, eh!? Aren't i?

In an alternate universe there is a planet where it's the guys and not the girls who are masters in the totally annoying internet art of duckfacing. But fear not, it's not something that could ever happen here. Could it!?

The key to looking classy & sexy in Russia seems to be to look like an oompa loompa and live in a town near chernobyl. Barbie cloning gone wrong. Nuclear devastation is the only answer for most of them!